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Tuesday, December 16, 2003

The Most Functional Word

Well, it's shit........
That's right, shit! Shit may just be the most functional
word in the English language.

Consider this:

You can be shit faced, like a drunk persn
Shit out of luck, like Joe's dad
Or have shit for brains. like marcus

With a little effort, you can get your shit together, if your smart enough
Find a place for your shit, in the basement.. if you dont have one in the barn
Or decide to shit or get off the pot... hopefully your done before you get off

You can smoke shit, like cheech and chong did on their movie
Buy shit, sell shit, though I'd rather sell shit.. why would I want to have shit? it smells
Lose shit, find shit, lets lose it all .. and I"m not finding the pooper scooper
Forget shit, Joe does that all the time
And tell others to eat shit and die. perhaps americans can do this one

Some people know their shit, well from this post marcus knows all about shit
While others can't tell the difference between shit and shineola. what's shineola????

There are lucky shits, is this when your in church and yew have a wet fart?
Dumb shits, perhaps this is the wet fart that is in a crowd and someone notices
Crazy shits, this is the person that shits himself jumping out of a plane
And sweet shits. I hope there is no such thing

There is bull shit, actiontec modems are great
Horse shit (but I dont believe that)
And chicken shit. yes they run away and ya dont gotta werry bout smellin that they shit themsevles

You can throw shit, hopefully you use a shovel
Sling shit, in the other direction
Catch shit, I dont recomend this it could go all over yerself
Shoot the shit, umm this means it's in yer mouth
Or duck when shit hits the fan. similar to catch the shit only it's unexpected

You can give a shit... please give it to the toilet
Or serve shit on a shingle. how did you get on the roof?
You can find yourself in deep shit . long as it's not over yer neckk you might still have a chance
Or be happier than a pig in shit. in which case your already covered in it.. y ew disgust me

Some days are colder than shit, well at least it's rock hard
Some days are hotter than shit, eewwwww slimy and runny
And some days are just plain shitty. yeah like the hot ones

Some music sounds like shit, though I've never heard shit talk.. perhaps your reffering to farts yeah thats bad
Things can look like shit, ever seen green slimy stuff? no? marcus can show you a picture I"m sure
And there are times when you feel like shit. I'll not comment to this as shit (I hope) has no feelings

You can have too much shit, not in my opinion
Not enough shit, well I suppose
The right shit, is there such a thing?
The wrong shit, if your lucky ya dont
Or a lot of weird shit. is that like jackass... being inside a portipotty turned upside down?

You can carry shit, though again I wouldn't wanna
Have a mountain of shit, as long as your on top
Or find yourself up shit creek without a paddle. hopefully your in the boat

Sometimes everything you touch turns to shit, dont you wish that was gold (like the fairy tale)
and other times you fall in a bucket of shit and come out smelling like a rose. ...

or you could just eat shit and be done with it :P
(edited by siteowner) LeeEeeMuR

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Creater: Joe Earhart
Email: LeeEeeMuR@msn.com

 

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